Conversational Style

Welcome to my Conversational Style book summary!

One-Sentence-Summary: Published in 1984, Conversational Style, is a sociology book attempting to break down a Thanksgiving conversation between seven people to identify patterns for, seemingly, the sake of identifying somewhat obvious speech patterns.

I’ve paused reading Conversational Style by Deborah Tannen. Current page: 88

booboo real-time book rating: ★★★☆☆ (percentage of books with this rating: 34%)

When I heard the premise of this book, I had to buy it, even though it was recommended by another book that I also had to stop halfway through. A rule of mine to never buy a book based on a recommendation from another book you did not enjoy proves accurate, yet again.

So, what’s the problem? A few things:

First, the book is not about giving real-world applicable advice. It’s an analysis of segments of a conversation. And, honestly, even as socially inept as I am, most of the stuff she was analyzing is going to be evident to most readers who’ve grown up as a human for more than a decade.

Second, the written word is not the most effective medium for conveying this information. It required double the focus to interpret the conversations, given the presence of both visual and verbal cues. The author has a system to notate where pauses are and when different syllables are emphasized, but..

Third, I read a full third of the book, breaking down to insane detail all the different connections of the dinner attendees, which I think should have been introduced at a more relevant time, but there was something missing – a description of all the unique markings in the actual conversations. I couldn’t believe it. I searched YouTube and ChatGPT, which suggested much of it was due to a typing error. But I knew that to be false, given the quantity and consistently of these unusual notations. Just be aware that she identifies her system at the very back of the book. By that point, the damage was done and I put down the book for not helping provide actionable advice.

This blog will contain both my summary and review of the book Conversational Style.

As I read the book, you will find my in-progress Conversational Style review and book summary notes below.

You are reading my book review and summary by Deborah Tannen. Be sure to check out my digital bookshelf for 100+ book summaries.

Did you know I’m an author? I wrote four books on real estate investing, travel, and language learning.

New Words

dyad (noun) – something that consists of two parts of elements (a healthy relationship is the most dyadic of all human activities.)

Thanks for visiting and thanks to Deboorah Tannen for writing Conversational Style!

Date Started: Wednesday, April 2, 2025

Date Finished: