The Game

Welcome to my The Game book review and summary!

Date added to “All Time Favorite” list: 2008

booboo real-time book rating: ★★★★★ (percentage of books with this rating: 11%)Update (reading again, 17 years later): I am preparing a trip to Miami and Mystery is doing a BootCamp which I am considering attending. He’s now 53 years old. It’s interesting reading The Game with so much additional experience. I first read it as a Junior in college in 2009 when I was 21 years old. Now, I have my doubts. Neil Strauss is a great writer. And great it is to write about how you were the best pickup artist in the world. How you had men imitating you. How you got a standing ovation after giving a talk. How Tyler Durden asks you what’s so special about you to get a girl like Lisa, and how Tyler Durden knows he’ll never be able to get a girl like her to be his girlfriend (Chapter 9, Part 11). How nice to be able to keep out any valid criticisms. He made sure to leave in subtlety critical sentences about his rival, Mystery, “.. the only girl who responded to Mystery calls was Katya [on Mondays they called all the women they met in the weekend].” (p. 483) On the next page: “When Mystery called her, she didn’t remember him.” (p. 484) How could this be? The greatest PUA would, visually memorable, expert in creating big impressions. The teacher of Style. Was Neil Strauss, or Style, a great pickup artist? Undoubtedly if the definition is the ability to meet and sleep with women. Was he getting 9s and 10s? Maybe, but probably not. The mother of his child, Ingrid, is very attractive. This lends credence to his ability to actually pick up highly attractive women. However, there is no photo proof from back then. And, I’ve seen him recently in interviews. I’m not impressed. He repeats the same talking points about the same topics, over and over, but with a aire of excitement to be sharing as if it was the first. What this suggests is that he’s not an expert on the topics he’s writing about, picking up women being one. He can’t talk to a depth with the topics he covered in The Truth, his follow up book where he gave marriage a try and failed. This theme repeats itself throughout the book but it’s sly because he’s always using a third-party. “You’re the only one who I’d like to resemble. You do interesting things, have an awesome job and cool girl.” (p. 618)

Not a how-to manual. It’s a story of a loser, a depressed, young adult — Neil Strauss — when an opportunity of a lifetime (unbeknownst to him at the time) fell into his lap through his writing career. He entered the world of Pick-Up Artists and became, arguably, the world’s best. The book details his experience and wild stories, including Project Hollywood, where a few of the best PUAs lived, including Mystery and the Real Social Dynamics folks, which was a thriving business until its downfall in 2018.

The most important quote I added, then read the book years later in Spanish, and it was one of the few powerful quotes I noticed, and realized it’s already here: “But who are we, really? Just a bundle of good genes and bad genes mixed with good habits and bad habits. And since there’s no gene for coolness or confidence, then being uncool and unconfident are just bad habits, which can be changed with enough guidance and will power.” (p. 270)

Talk in statement form instead of asking questions. Statements are how you speak with people you’re already comfortable with.

“The first thing you say to a woman matters very little. Some guys tell me they can’t think of anything or they need a really good line. I tell them they are thinking too much. You are not that important. I am not that important. We have never thought a thought so great that it needs to be wrapped with so much care. Give up your need for perfection. As far as opening lines go, a grunt or a fart is sufficient.”

Talk slower. Fast talkers lack confidence and it’s as if they are worried they will lose the attention of the other person.

A girl who is quiet or doesn’t acknowledge you may just be insecure or shy. Don’t assume she’s a bitch.

For a girl to remember you the next day, ask her if she’s a thief and when she says no then give her something of yours and tell her it’s for her to remember the night but it’s not a gift and you want it back the next time you see her and the item is special for you.

IMPORTANT: the false time constraint

“A significant percentage of violent crime, from kidnappings to shooting sprees, is the result of frustrated sexual impulses and desires of males.” I’d be interested to learn more about this. I’ve had periods of my life, more than I’d like to admit, where I felt totally insignificant to the opposite sex. It’s not a good feeling to be undesirable. Unless I’m able to let go, I get depressed, anti-social, and generally withdraw from society, which leads to bitterness and a me-against-the-world feeling. I channel it into productivity.

“Respect” when a girl told him she gives good head. This one word should be used when a girl is trying to show off.

Cold Reading

You know? Upon seeing you, I can imagine perfectly what you were like when you were 14 years old. And I’d bet you were not as popular or extroverted as you are now..I suppose many people think you’re full of yourself but deep down I’m sure you’re a  timid girl.

Did you know I’m an author? I wrote four books on real estate investing, travel, and language learning.

“All of the passionate relationships I’ve had have started passionately..Maybe you shouldn’t have slept with me so quickly, but if you had done it it’s because you wnated to, you needed to..I’m more mature than the men you’ve been with up until now and you shouldn’t judge me based on your prior experiences..It would make me sad not to see you again.” (p. 279, rough translation from Spanish to English)

On Marriage and Love

My fear isn’t about the commitment. My fear is about arguing with someone I love about whose turn it is to do the dishes. My fear is no longer loving the woman I’m sleeping next to every night, her shift in priorities when our children are born, feeling resentment in putting limits on my freedom.

“We have the strange idea that love is sometime that should last an eternity, but love doesn’t work like this. Love is a free energy that comes and goes at its pleasure. Sometimes it lasts a lifetime, other times it accompanies us for seconds, a day, a month, or a year. We can’t fear love simply because it makes us vulnerable and neither can we surprised when it abandones us. The only thing we can do it be thankful at the fact to have been and to experience it.” (p. 298-9, roughly from Spanish)

Destinations mentioned in The Game by city. 

Miami, Florida

Cro (P5C2)

I hope you enjoyed reading my The Game book review and summary!